T O P
AnotherJasonOnReddit

Me at any gathering when the discussion suddenly changes to sex of any kind:


_jvc123

So, do you have a girlfriend? Me: I'll be right back.


Mo_Salah_

> So, do you have a girlfriend? *Well, I once beat an old lady with a stick*


Cyber-Knight47

Jesus Mo_Salah you are a freak


Super_Maddix_64

So, do you have a girlfriend? No, not exactly


Chemical-Asparagus58

Are you afraid I'm going to turn into some kind of celibate?


JCamson04

Quit worrying about me, okay? I’m a virgin, i’ll figure something out, stop giving me the talk please!


LuchadorBeachmaster

Well hello, almost me


Chemical-Asparagus58

I am you from 6 years in the future. In five years and 22 days, don't seat on the green chair, you will regret it.


LuchadorBeachmaster

I am you from 6 years in the past. Why did you eat that muffin on the ground? I'm still having intense, unstoppable diarrhea, and my anus is starting to swell from the unbearable pain


Chemical-Asparagus58

In the grand calculus of the multiverse, your sacrifice means far more than your diarrhea.


Chemical-Asparagus58

If it's a woman you're calling, then you say: "You're good woman. I'm good man..."


Markushasmagic

I don’t really know


mikereeee

"i have to return some videotapes"


Belkan-Federation

Plot twist: you do have one and the stress was too much so you had to go visit her


vigilantcomicpenguin

Me at any gathering when any discussion:


GriffinFlash

Me at gathering:


Strix86

Me:


aRandomFox-I

Your mum: "Hey, I heard you're still a virgin. Can't be having that! Wanna bang?"


RenownedRetard

🤨


HyperKevnetic_Impuls

:lurkingeyes:


BetaThetaOmega

Why debate LGBTQ issues with family when you could stab yourself in the kidney for the exact same result


Vord_Loldemort_7

Both faster and more painless!


VerySmartDaBaby

I'm surprised this man has been doing this series for 3 years now


TinyZ666

He’s a hero


SeniorRicketts

Why is he wearing a mask then? What is he hiding?


Ser_Salty

He's a menace!


Okichah

This is the last line before the final battle iirc. So all thats left is the goblin battle then the epilogue. End of an era, kinda.


[deleted]

[удалено]


MyName_IsNobody

About 3/4ths, I believe.


CornchipUniverse

So we have another year?


MrHotcake

I'm not gonna do the math but I'm kind of sure it's gonna end in this year


DesparateServe

Oh, i'm not brave enough for politics


JCamson04

Hold on, this whole operation was your idea


TinyZ666

Quit worrying about me, ok? Somethings different, I’ll figure it out!


JCamson04

Oh I have a bad feeling about this


Koiboivcr

I want to see this raimi spider-man -star wars crossover


JCamson04

Raimi Spidey and Prequels SW were my childhood, I’m so happy they’re getting love again this year and the last (NWH and Kenobi)


Worried_Highway5

r/raimiprequelmemes you’re welcome


redditer333333338

We have a successful fusion reaction


Belkan-Federation

Not so fast Spider-Man! Helmet! At last we meet for the first time for the last time Before you die there is some--- Wait wrong movie


Andy_DiMatteo

(Me after changing the subject abruptly) and you owe me one! As not for saving your skin for the 10th time.


JCamson04

9th time, that business in cato neimoidia doesn’t count.


RumAndCoco

Let us not forget that you rescued your cousin from the last discussion, saved them from being outed, and that you were carrying me on your back at the bar.


titanslayereren

How about another topic Murray ?


DesparateServe

No, i think we have had enough of your topics


AmaterasuWolf21

What do you get-


Rosssauced

Was at a work meeting yesterday and some old fuck who is on the board just said "so what does everyone think about the overturn of Roe v Wade" as if we can actually speak on the issue at work.


Vord_Loldemort_7

Bruh 💀


robertman21

jesus christ


Rosssauced

I know right?


Garrret

Based as fuck, love to drop topic granades at christmas dinner even when specifically said to dont bring up politics


Rosssauced

Glad you think it was based because it was bullshit. Here in the real world my paycheck and career advancement potential is predicated on doing my job well and not pissing off the higher ups. Not a cool thing to do to your subordinates when it is very clear that speaking freely is not really an option.


Garrret

I meant it in a family gathering like in a holiday not work, but i actually find it funny that your boss try to bait you like that lol. You dont have it different than anyone tho, its never a good idea to tell you personal politics at work wheter you are an employee or boss.


Rosssauced

Never said I was different. Just that my boss was an asshole for doing a shitty thing. It isn't haha funny but it is wtf funny.


Belkan-Federation

I promise I won't get all political Three drinks later: https://youtu.be/ViwOPrYEgDA (Even if I can't understand it, it is fucking awesome)


TheArizonaRanger97

Im not LGBTQ but this is relatable


Vord_Loldemort_7

Yeah, apply this to any other group or position that your family talks about and there is without a doubt at least one person who feels this way


The-Ravioli-Mage

My nerd ass family when Scotty’s missing finger comes up.


connornation

Nah same tho. Topic switches to this and I just stay silent


DoctaCrane

When you have to return some videotapes


Holiday-Home8842

You want forgiveness! Get a religion


yuccabloom

Hey, that's what my grandma tells me!


Vord_Loldemort_7

Me after realizing it's been Pride Month for 25 days and I haven't made a single Pride meme: I'm going to rectify certain inequities.


_jvc123

You're late. I'm not paying for those.


kebab69666

I need that money


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nadia1306

Good bot


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zyrusvito

A meme under a meme? You have outdone yourself u/Vord_Lolemort_7


vnsa_music

You think your fancy new meme set is gonna save you?


iLoveBums6969

His parents must be very proud.


Dreenar18

Brilliant but lazy


TsunamifoxyDCfan

Godspeed Voldyman!


SeniorRicketts

GoooOooOoo!


Willing-Load

don’t ever be ashamed of who you are.


TinyZ666

I’m not ashamed of who I am.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TinyZ666

Forget it.


ACubeInABox

I’m gonna put some gay in your eye


SeniorRicketts

No no no stop stoooop!


Chief106

Gonna cry?


WhatABunchofBologna

That’s a cute gay. Did your husband give it to you?


koalathebean

Day 1158? So this started before the pandemic??


Vord_Loldemort_7

Way before!


JCamson04

I admire the dedication Commencement.


BeastLegend64

bruh fr I just want to enjoy my damn fried chicken


[deleted]

It's a gay country not rent free country.


AkuVader

We’re in the endgame now…


Miller-MGD

I’m just gonna say that even Green Goblin said “Now Choose!”


EraseAndRetake

You're pathetically predictable...


eeftechel

When your entire family is prolife


Vord_Loldemort_7

Me: I’d rather not talk about that right now.


Sith_Destroyer_1138

You are good woman. I am good man!


Cantthinkofonebitch

Being gay legitimately is gay


Vord_Loldemort_7

Source?


MorgothReturns

Source: I know a guy whose uncle met a gay person's cousin once.


Vord_Loldemort_7

Fair


Nikapopolis

*Hiding in the shadows…* *Hiding from who you truly are!*


blakk_foxe

My Aroace ass explaining why the girl that came with me is literally just a friend I play video games with (My family is aphobic):


Scorpion_200

If you'll excuse me I've got to get going


book1245

You know, I'm something of a guy-entist myself.


ThisIsMrAbapo

Welp. Time for me to run!   (Day 155 of commenting)


SaAvilez

If you'll excuse me I've got to be going. Something... has come to my attention.


vigilantcomicpenguin

I like how Peter looks with the rainbow filter. That'd make a good Spidey-suit.


Vord_Loldemort_7

Multiversal gay Spider-Man


KiraLover

its simple, people can have the gender and sexuallity that they want


Vord_Loldemort_7

We are who we choose to be! Now… choose!


nicolasmcfly

We always have a choice


Substantial_Park7811

Basic biology has left the chat


EpicRamen05

Me less than a week ago


TheGodOfGravy

Out, am I?!


coolgr3g

I looked it up. Everybody is making a huge deal about 0.6% of the population. There are literally more people with chartreuse as their favorite color than there are trans people in America. It's a non issue unless of course the underlying issue is about conformity and control, which it is.


Vord_Loldemort_7

Bro literally what Edit: Oh I see your meaning


Substantial_Park7811

So 0.6% of them are mentally ill ?


The-Ravioli-Mage

Fuck who yous wanna fuck, labels don’t matter. Maybe not dogs though, cats are fair game though.


Vord_Loldemort_7

Nooooo not cats


The-Ravioli-Mage

What are you? Some kinda pussy lover?


PropaneSalesman7

Me but I'm a conservative and my family is liberal


Substantial_Park7811

Based 🤝


MisterEChops

Your poor family


PropaneSalesman7

Yeah, it must really suck bring a liberal.


MisterEChops

> liberal. You don’t know the definition of that word…


PropaneSalesman7

Liberal (noun) (lib·​er·​al | \ ˈli-b(ə-)rəl): Someone who is stupid and who disagrees with me


MisterEChops

Thanks for confirming my previous assumption. I actually really appreciate it.


PropaneSalesman7

I guess, by definition, that makes you a liberal.


MisterEChops

That’s not the definition of liberal at all. Why do you feel the need to lie? It’s so weak. Go and look it up, I’ll wait.


PropaneSalesman7

That's literally the definition of the word, though.


MisterEChops

It definitely isn’t. Why are you lying dude? Weren’t you raised better?


NeoCosmoPolitan

Considering your long history of transphobia, I’m gonna say you’re a conservative.


PropaneSalesman7

/u/neocosmopolitan Excellent reading comprehension, bro. You deduced I was a conservative by combing through my post history instead of just reading my first comment on this thread. Also, it isn't "people I disagree with", it's "people who disagree with ME."


NeoCosmoPolitan

“Everyone I disagree with is a Liberal”


UltimaBahamut93

Gonna cry?


KingWhoCared86

We don’t do that here.