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DaDanielE

or superpowers like seeing in the dark and growing a third arm


[deleted]

[удалено]


Nemesis233

A desk would do the trick bro


827167

Ok but can your desk press buttons for you? I didn't think so


Nemesis233

Yours can't? Cheap ass desk you got bro


827167

No need to make fun of me for it! My is poor, I need to have my duel RTX3090 with sli gaming PC with RGB keyboard and 49" monitor on the floor bc I can't afford a desk alright? No need to rub it in man! /jk btw


jerax101

Among us


Groundbreaking_Roll9

Jacking off while using two hands to hold the phone. I wish I grew a third arm.


N_twice11yt

Same


Gerasia_Glaucus

Why only a third arm, I want what Machamp has, 4 arms!


PM_ME_YOUR_ROTES

I want my Magneto abilities!


NoobsRedditType

get free wifi everywhere you go


ProwlerPlayzYT

hold up ding ding ringdididing diding diding


SoberAnxiety

i got vaccinated because i want yo become patient zero of the zombie apocalypse.gotta make the ancestors proud


Jonnytan713

**Get wifi anywhere you go!** Hold up ring ding ding ding ding ding ding


Overman_1000

Bounced on my boy's 5g network to this for hours


Late47

Lol I had a neighbor, she was a teacher maybe still is, who genuinely believed it was 5G towers infecting people with Covid.... I laughed... She did not think it was funny. It was truly hilarious


Dimension_Skipper

My grandma thought getting the vaccine would mean she would die, so she was just like "guess I'll die". Like she didn't want to... but for some reason she just thought it was fine that her kids were sending her to her death. She didn't die.


NEWTYAG667000000000

I think there's something wrong with your grandma


poorpotatoe2332

Shake her twice and wack her on the back. Should fix it.


maverick221

Or just the ol’ turn it off and on again


CreeperAsh07

I can’t find the on button. Plz help.


[deleted]

Try to take the SIM card out and put it back in, if she doesn’t reboot then you may have to buy a new SIM card


CreeperAsh07

I don’t know how install the SIM card. For the off button, I blindly hit her with a baseball bat hoping to hit it, but I did the same for the on button but nothing happened.


CaramelCupcake1111

Good for her, my grandpa almost died from it. He got a blood clot in his leg from the vaccine that "doesn't give blood clots" it traveled to his heart and he had a triple bypass and heart surgery.


the_heartiste

just to clarify, blood clots do not give you the need to have bypass surgery. You get bypass surgery because you have clogged (blocked) coronary arteries likely due to years of common risk factors - which can include high cholesterol, inactivity, bad diet, hypertension, and smoking. It's possible that while he got the blood clot that went to his lungs they actually discovered his coronary disease before he had a full-blown heart attack. A blood clot (dvt) that goes from the leg to the lungs is called a pulmonary embolism and can certainly be deadly but in this case it appears to have revealed his underlying coronary disease. just sayin', cardiologist here.


CaramelCupcake1111

Yeah, that's what happened. He is very active though, his diet was (and still is) so-so. I was pretty vague sorry. The triple bypass was from what you said but the blood clot was from the vaccine. So a curse and a blessing at the same time.


rivigurl

This is a great example of people telling their side to show a certain narrative. “Grandpa got a blood clot from the vaccine and needed surgery” when really the vaccine helped show the warning signs before him dying from a heart attack.


Ultikiller

your grandpa got some shit luck


EquivalentSnap

What about people who don’t get vaccinated because they want to get covid and die


YrodBlay

Shit, didn’t think of that


EquivalentSnap

Yeah. There’s more doing that than those who get the vaccine in hopes of doing it


Emmerilla

well thats pretty inefficient, since you will most likely suffer but wont die, if you have decent healthcare and no illness already


hugthemachines

It has a higher chance at succeeding than getting the vaccine hoping it will kill you.


Manky19

I got the vaccine so I could become spiderman.


EquivalentSnap

Nice. I like your avatar btw


Manky19

Thanks, I wanted to look stupid.


DappyDee

You called?


Cant_Meme_for_Jak

Gotta shop in another bunny


rivigurl

I have at least 4 closer friends who are like this. Two have gotten Covid already and they think they’re in the clear forever. Lol


XanthosAcanthus

Not gonna lie, I felt like I was dying after I got my booster. It’s strange though because I had no reaction after my first two shots. Was only sick for a day though. Edit: just to clarify, this doesn’t always happen and I’m not trying to dissuade anyone from getting the booster. But be prepared for a rough day or two because it can happen.


Andysgirl1080

Yeah after the booster it was the sickest I’ve ever been. I was shaking so bad and felt like I was on fire. Lasted a day like yours.


XanthosAcanthus

Yeah, same. It was actually very similar to bad alcohol withdrawals. I woke up and thought I was losing it and having phantom withdrawals or something because I’ve been sober for a few months. It felt so similar that all I could think was that I needed a damn drink to make it stop. Had to keep reminding myself that I was fine, alcohol won’t make it go away, and it was just the shot.


AndrexoHD

just to clarify for anyone reading this: This is normal. It can happen and is nothing serious.


XanthosAcanthus

Yeah. Totally normal. Best to get it like a day before an off day. I ran a fever and wasn’t allowed to work just in case.


Andysgirl1080

Yep. Just mean it’s working.


rivigurl

I got pretty weak the second day and ended up throwing up a smoothie I had. I felt better afterward tho


Anon-nomnom

If you think that’s bad bro imagine what would’ve happened if you caught the actual virus instead


XanthosAcanthus

Technically I tested positive for it before the vaccines were out, but I didn’t show any symptoms aside from a fever. But that bad boy keeps mutating so I probably won’t be so lucky next time. Like I met a medical assistant a few weeks ago that got it bad in 2020. Apparently she still can’t taste or smell. No one told me that shit could be permanent. That’s pretty unfortunate.


The_yellowest_stick

There is another: people who get vaccinated because they are addicted.


Christroyilator

The only thought on my mind is how I'm going to get my next booster.


noiceFTW

Get every company's shot and become superhuman


salty_Gsus

Those who know (* *)


FreeLifeCreditCheck

I got vaccinated because I wanted to update my autism.


rivigurl

Same. Can confirm. Autism has been updated fully.


noiceFTW

Got the patch notes for the new update? I'm thinking of updating


PROJECTRICE1567

You guys only just got the update? I already got mine earlier from the premium subscription. Gotta ensure my Autism is top of the line after all.


[deleted]

People who don't get vaccinated hoping it will kill them


ImMinistrim

What about people who do it to spite their antivax parents?


CheesecakeRacoon

I think those would probably fall into the second category


Nemesis233

Chads


ArcGirly_CD

I’m part of the third group


Wise_Case3382

I didn't got vaccinated hoping covid finish me off


Ok_Yogurtcloset9964

Starting licking everything.


jedicicle

Me who doesn't get the vaccine because I hope it will kill me.


this-anarchy-guy

I’m also in this fourth group.


EmigmaticDork

What about the people who don't want it because they don't like being told what to do?


honey_1209

Welcome aboard


kajijis

Me who wont get vaccinated so i have an excuse to not attend family gatherings


Elon_Musk_cat_girl

I’m in the group that doesn’t get vaccinated before we have researched a decent amount of the side effects


tyomig

I don't get vaccinated because I don't believe it will kill me )=


IHaveJigglyTitties

I didnt get vaccinated cos I dont need it, 4th lonely group


SlavBoii420

And there are also a fourth group who takes so many vaccines to become immortal


Skipplx

They told me i wouldnt get kids anymore!!! Hope its true otherwise i'll be a dad very soon


degeneratedetox

Use a condom, skip!


[deleted]

people who dont get vaccinated becuase they dont think it will do anything Edit: there are actually reasonable people who dont want to get vaccinated and people keep shoving them into the "brainwashed facebook prophet group" which i guess i can understand because when you see someone who is an antivaxxer they are probably one of those people who think that if you get vaccinated you are gonna turn into a robot that works for the goverment or some dumb shit but cmon, what the hell


DIO_rite

the same people who get their information from 10 minute toilet research on their phone


FreeLifeCreditCheck

Or from Facebook prophets. "I read on Facebook that the vaccine makes people sterile." Facebook, huh? What a reputable source!


AokiMiku

What about the people who only get vaccinated because they want to do things again? Like going into restaurants and bars.


Ardietic

you can go into bars to drink to hopefully die of the alcohol


MessiMagic5000

Same here


Rosirosenkohl

Oh gym, Bus, Train


Jacob030816

I mean I just wanna get every vaccine and booster at once and turn into captain corona but noooooo people say it'll kill me smh


Salmon_Of_Knowledge_

It seems like everyone has a fucking 8 page essay about why their not vaccinated. I’m just sitting here not wanting to wait in line at Walmart.


OtakuOtakuNoMi

I got a special thingy from my doctor when I was little that I didn’t need to get any vaccinations because of a problem with my immune system that could cause a vaccine to kill me. It’s been many years since then, so I considered getting it, but it’s apparently genetic so I doubt it just went away. I’m a hikkikomori anyways, so I just hide inside all day.


Salmon_Of_Knowledge_

Nah I’m talking about the people that are like, “I will not get the vaccine as I have special immunity gifted from the lord or some shit”


wowthatsucc

They're*


poorpotatoe2332

Stop it. Get some help.


Some_Noname_idk

People who don't vaccinate because they hope it will protect them


JureFlex

But thats the 1st group


Some_Noname_idk

no


JureFlex

Yes


laminatedjoe

Technically different, one thinks the vaccine will hurt them more than getting the virus, the other thinks they are more protected against the virus without the vaccine. The only thing in common? They're both idiots.


JureFlex

That i agree haha


ye_YES

What about people who don’t get vaccinated because it doesn’t work and they’re not afraid of Covid because they’re not an overweight 80 yr old


DIO_rite

I knew someone who died from covid at 17, she was healthy and not overweight. Covid can kill you no matter age or health. You just have better chances when you're young. Also I'd really like to know where you learned so much about the covid vaccine and how you know that it's true


Prims3s

Nah I got Covid 2 times and I am pretty healthy. Didn't vaccinate. Btw I am not an antivaxxer, I just didn't get the Covid vaccine


Prims3s

"oH yOuR 10 mInUtEs oF tOilEt rEsEaRcH mEaNs NotHiNG" jeez no. I don't speak English very well but I'll try to explain in a (not so much) scientific way but in a, like, logical way if you want


NiteTime2345

"I got in a car crash without a seatbelt, so they're not necessary".


t8rt0t_the_hamster

They're the ones doing "research" in the bathroom


EmigmaticDork

I had the vid before the gene therapy was even around. lame month as it spread through the fam, but i got that natural immunity. better than the vax


momopoly52

I don´´t get vaccined Im not a sheep.


Nub_Head

What about the ones who don't get vaccinated because they want everyone to die


ac1dre1gn77

My coworker is in a fourth group. I had to hear an hour and a half long rant about a global conspiracy and how the virus and tests are fake, the vaccines are a way to "cull the herd". How a doctor or scientist blew it all out in the open and a week later died, he wont comply and they can come and try to take him yada yada yada


massivelj

Where are the people who don't get vaccinated because they don't need to be protected


DIO_rite

They don't exist, you know you can still die from covid when you're young and healthy. It's just more unlikely


Notiamliamrowe

I’m one of the people who believe that the vaccine 💉 will kill me


CaramelCupcake1111

I commented this somewhere else in this comment section and it got downvotes (I didn't have the part about my friend though...) My grandpa almost died from the vaccine, the one that "doesn't give blood clots." Yeah, he got a blood clot in his leg, it traveled to his heart. He had a triple bypass and heart surgery. The hospital referred to him as "their miracle survivor." And some people literally CAN'T get the vaccine, my friend is allergic to some of the ingredients.


StephenLandis

A friend of mine always says that he is 'part of the select few that always get bad reactions to stuff'. He does everything to protect against viruses of course, because he agrees that covid-19 is a very real thing. But he's leery of the vaccine


DIO_rite

I'm sorry for your loss but that doesn't make the vaccine bad, the chance of dying from it are much lower than the chances of dying from covid. He was just one of the few unlucky. The vaccine saved so many lives compared to the few lives it took.


Far-Desk6881

Agreed...I have MS and I got the 2 rounds, & waiting on the booster. I became pretty ill after the 2nd shot, but to me it's a no brainer. I dont want to die, and I feel it's my duty as a member of the earth to try to help stomp this shit out. Especially for those allergic to the vaccine, or have an autoimmune disease and can't vaccinate.


UnderTrench

tf kinda mentality is that


NiteTime2345

Some people have probably does because of seatbelts (couldn't get out while a car sank), but your chances of dying in a car crash without a seatbelt are much higher.


DIO_rite

Yes, I was trying to say that but I kinda sounded like an asshole the way I said it


Anywhere_Total

What about those who don't do the vaccine knowing it will protect them?


Aliveleopard9

I don't need the c-19 vaccine because I never leave the house


thecheapseatz

Everyone knows anti-vaxxers are just scared of needles if the vaccine came in a suppository they would happily take it


wishmaster2021

What about people who get vaccinated because they KNOW it will protect them?


___ARG___

Why is this downvoted? It’s true


EldritchBoi07

Because they *don't* KNOW unless they personally developed every aspect of the vaccine, they're just believing that it works because some very specialized people told them it would


wishmaster2021

Because the majority of people on this planet are idiots. That's why.


___ARG___

Agreed


Ok_Establishment5607

it doesnt protect you at all. you cant be unhealthy, have a terrible immune system pre-vaccination and expect to be protected. Lol this is not super juice


ProfessionalOk4716

Gotta say, the few people in my life who are suicidal, rushing to get masks, and vaccinate, and when you bring it up they just tell you to shut up.


EldritchBoi07

Idk about you, but most suicidal people go for a relatively painless method, not "slowly drowning on their own bodily fluids over a period of weeks while struggling to breathe the entire time"


hugthemachines

Yeah, and most suicidal people just want to die, not make sure they spread stuff to others.


ProfessionalOk4716

But yet here they still are


International-Job-20

I wouldn't be hugging the un-vaccinated person. 6ft luddite!


byAndrewsDesign

4th group. people who purposefully get covid to get it over with. there is an article about this via cnn.


lonesamurai84

I hoped so hard.


Mavenwit

Third group


PhantomOfTheOpera404

I got vaccinated because I wanted the pain...


I_LoveFrogs

Also people who don't get it in hope it'll kill them


madmaxcool01

I am still waiting, I did it 2 weeks ago, and I am fine.....


senbonkagetora

Third times the charm


FM79SG

well if you get many doses in one day you might die


Firespecialstar

I got vacinated because


Arrow_Maestro

There is a fourth group.


Open-Chemistry-9662

me i need help


Terrible_Carob_647

"HOPE" changed the game here


Irklord

Either I get virus protection or a die. It's a win win situation for me.


plz_just_kill_me

still alive...


069OOO

lol


PrepetuallyMeager

Get out of my head


Kingcowt1

I get vax bc übercharge


CarAndMotorcycleGuy

Funny 🤣


rc1717

Bruh everyone is like saying big pharma and the deep state are tricking ourselves into injecting poison and im like yes please kill me


[deleted]

People who don‘t get vaccinated hoping to be killed by the virus.


marine404333

hey look its me


ARussianSheep

I keep telling people I hope grow a third arm or tail or some shit.


PurestEvil5_9

That's gonna be a bit difficult...


Dreamerslot

It's a win win situation


rayyanfuzail

There is another. People who don't get vaccinated because they don't want to be protected


RASPUTIN-4

People who got vaccinated so everyone else would shut up about it


Yuristorm

I got vaccinated because needles cool


HellaAutist

I just wanted to get chipped so I’m not so lonely anymore.


Shikyogami

I wish it had killed me


MarshallCoop

What about the guys getting sexually aroused by the stitch of the needle


pencilrust

I got sick with Covid two times and all I got was terrible vomiting and diarrhea. Better luck next time.


Chance-Reporter-2910

This blade will not keeeel


dienye_xxl

You got vaccinated because you want to live. I got vaccinated because I wanted to die. We are not the same


Pandasq88

I bought the home covid test. I only got the test, no covid. What a scam !


killmebby-92

what about those who gets vaccinated cuz they love needles?


brulagfr

In Philippines you need to pay just to get fake vaccine lol


[deleted]

r/me_irl


DwemerSmith

imean i got the jab bc if it’s good then it’s good, but if bill gates is gonna activate the kill switch i wouldn’t mind dying


Drag0n_TamerAK

Guys it gives you free 5G


calvinsmythe

People who get vaccinated cause you know. The thing. Cmon


LadyMemer_23

I don't get the vaccin cause I'm scared of needles


Omrocksalot12

There is another


Late47

What about people who don't get it just because they are lazy, or have anxiety


Skin_Sofa

If I had a dime for every pixel in this image I would have three cents


DraconixDG

THEY DISCOVERED US


Victor_guiltythorn

Yea, then people ask why you did get it and you gotta make up some stupid shit on the spot


POPCORN_GUY483

People who are just afraid of needles


itsplaid

4th group, we just don’t care. By we, I mean Floridians obviously


UnofficalMushroom

Me, who doesn't get the vaccine because I have a crippling phobia of needles: Hey, what about us?


SirGrimory

I do it so my government doesn't soft gate me from entering certain buildings.